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Legal & General Construction Wellbeing Programme · Talk 3 of 10

Asking for Help

Toolbox Talk: Talking About How You Really Are

At a Glance

Construction has a long culture of 'get on with it.' But staying silent when you're struggling costs lives, suicide rates in low-skilled male construction workers are 3.7 times the national average. Asking for help is not a weakness. It's the single most effective thing you can do when you're not coping. One conversation really can make a difference.

In the Ownminder App · Looking After Yourself

The Looking After Yourself section focuses on self-compassion, realistic expectations and the skill of accepting support from others.

  • Accepting Help: Walks through exactly why asking for help is both rational and beneficial, and gives five practical steps for how to ask clearly without apologising.
  • Critical Voice: Helps you recognise when you're being harsh with yourself and replace self-critical internal language with the kinder words you'd use for a friend.
  • Realistic Expectations: Identifies signs you're expecting too much of yourself, perfectionism, people-pleasing, goal-setting based on others' standards, and helps you recalibrate to what is genuinely achievable.

Discussion Questions

  1. MindForward Alliance research found that 85% of workers believe their employer cares about their mental health when leaders speak out on the topic. How visible is L&G's commitment to mental health on this site?
  2. What would make it easier for people on this site to speak up when struggling?
  3. Have you ever supported a colleague through a difficult time, what helped?
  4. What stops men in particular from asking for help, and what could change that?
  5. Do you know who the Mental Health First Aider is on this site?
  6. What will you do differently to check in on colleagues who seem to be struggling?

Recognising the Signs

It can be hard to know you're struggling until it's become serious. Warning signs include: withdrawing from colleagues, increased alcohol or substance use, changes in appetite, persistent low mood, difficulty sleeping, feeling hopeless or trapped, or thoughts of self-harm. You don't need to be 'bad enough' to deserve support. If something feels wrong, that's enough reason to reach out. The Puget Sound Energy mental health continuum model identifies four states: Healthy -> Reacting -> Injured -> Ill. The support available to you maps to each stage, Ownminder for Healthy and Reacting, MHFA and EAP for Injured, and NHS/crisis services for Ill. You do not need to be at the Ill stage to ask for help.

Things to Try

Support is closer than you think. You don't need to have all the words, starting the conversation is what matters. Here's how to take the first step:

  • Talk to a trusted colleague, manager or Mental Health First Aider on site
  • Use the Ownminder app for confidential self-help tools and signposting
  • Contact the Employee Assistance Programme (EAP), free, confidential, 24/7
  • Call the Samaritans any time on 116 123, free, no judgement required
  • If in immediate crisis: call 999 or attend your nearest A&E

Earlier Recovery

Problems addressed early are much easier to resolve than those left to escalate.

Reduced Isolation

Sharing a struggle reduces its weight, and often reveals others feel the same.

Safer Sites

A culture where people speak up creates a safer environment for everyone.

Support

MHFA on site (free, confidential) · EAP 24/7 (free, confidential) · Samaritans 116 123 (free, any time) · Ownminder app · Lighthouse 0345 605 1956

Attendance Declaration

I have attended this toolbox talk, heard the content, and know where to access Ownminder, MHFA, EAP and crisis support if I need it.

Name

Signature

Standard 2 (Senior Leadership, psychological safety) · Standard 11 (Culture) · Accessible Support

NEF: Give

Lever 5: Challenges masculine norms blocking help-seeking, directly addresses construction's 3.7x suicide rate gap